God Loves Schmucks Like Me

God...

Thank you...that work was fun today--I really enjoyed laughing with my co-workers and not taking work too seriously. Thanks for allowing me to randomly run into my sister at lunch--that made me feel comfortable, like I belong in this place. Thanks for the "meaty" work I had today; it felt good to use my head. Thanks also for the chance I had to sit and talk with several of our managers. I enjoyed building relationships with them. Thanks for all the bloggers in Oklahoma whom I've recently come across--I really identify with them. This makes me feel like I'm less alone; it makes me feel hopeful. And thank you most of all for the spiritual formation class tonight. I really loved the small group interaction with my two friends. We're so different, yet we need You so similarly.

Help me...get rid of the insidious pride that I'm only now beginning to see in my life. God, it causes the most awful clouds of anger, inferiority, fear, and hopelessness to envelop me. Please, help me stick my head above these clouds, encounter Your light, and get perspective. Help me get a grip--and be still. Help me see me as I am. Help me know your acceptance of me, and then help me accept myself. Clothe me with humility, like Jesus had.

Shane, I love you...I love that you struggle; you're not content to stay as you are. I love that you really, really want to know Me. I love that you're allowing Me to help you "lighten up"--and man do you need it :)! I love how you sat and talked with that fellow who dropped by your desk; you made him feel seen and human. I love how you've learned that you don't have to say every funny thing that pops into your head; you're learning that you don't need the attention that brings you. I love how you're maturing that way because it's a sign that I'm becoming you're identity. Shane, I see you, and my heart is toward you. I know all of your needs, and I will provide for every last one of them.

God, I'm sorry...that I've been such a prideful schmuck. I could grovel on and on about the many ways that has manifested itself in me, but that would be self-pity. So, I'll just say it again--I have been a prideful schmuck, and I'm sorry. We'll leave it at that.

Be with me...as I meet with people tomorrow at work and as I tackle the various tasks that await me. Be with me as I minister at City Rescue Mission tomorrow night. Be with me as "the clouds" explode in my head. Help me stick my head up above the clouds and encounter Your Son.

Amen.